It was just an ordinary BEST* night at dinner…30 bucks in food, 60 bucks in booze. All was fine until while waiting for the bill, two drunk dudes tried to talk to us. To paint the proper picture, GUY 1 looked 15, was dressed in head to toe Gap Khaki and had a sunburn in the shape of oakleys. GUY 2 was in seersucker pants, a navy blazer, an ascot and his teeth were glowing white. We are also pretty sure he had a spray tan and a bodywave. Below are some of our favorite excerpts from the conversation:

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BEST1:
Aren’t you wearing a wedding band?

GUY1:
That doesn’t mean I can’t share my ideas…

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GUY 2:
I told you, I’m from New York.

BEST 2:
Wait - where in New York did you say you were from?

GUY 2:
Michigan.

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GUY 1: You know the youngest couple to ever have a kid were 7 and 8 years old…in China.

BEST 2: Why are you telling us that?

GUY 1: Cause I could be your father.

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GUY 2: Why are you getting so mad at me?

BEST 1: Because you can’t reason with crazy.

BEST 2 : I believe this conversation is over.

GUY 2 (As we walk away): Wait…I like you…

BEST 1: Suck it Mr. Howell.

BEST 2: Nice burn!

(high-five)
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