Does anyone know who this is? He seems to be our most vocal and loyal reader and yet we are not sure who he is. Is he even real?
Here are some samples of his comments:
How about I come over there and melt your box for you lol
How did you get that? I thought I deleted it lol
Aisle be there for you 
We are really excited at the prospect of having a fan, but would find it pretty hilarious if one of you guys were messing with us…lol
OK- an egg genie goes to whomever comes up with the best rhyme about or inspired by Susan Boyle. And you have to use her name in it at least once. Bonus points if you can get Simon Cowell in it too but not a mandatory. Just post your rap as a comment to this before next wedensday. Don’t let us down (we are talking to you Sniper Twins)
In case you need more musical inspiration, here are some more photos of us from our recent Palm Springs vision quest. Clearly we don’t really know how to play instruments. And clearly we should never mix peyote with bloody maries again.
photos by maggie dunn
We got a late entry (JoshKoshBGosh) to our “stimulus package” rap challenge that is so hot, we decided to extend it. There are some really good ones up now and we know there are more of you out there wanting to get in on this. Make it happen (Ted, Darry, Dad…)
Read the original post and drop some rhymes on us here:
Rap Challenge Wednesday
Spoiler Alert:
BEST* is holed up at a house in Palm Springs on a writing retreat. We are calling it Palm Springsteen. It is sponsored by Screenwriter and Patron and cheese and Coppertone Sport 30+. For sponsorship opportunities email us. For photos and updates of us in the hot tub or the like, check back here as often as possible.
How long until “stimulus package” replaces “swagger” as the most popular word in hip hop? OK, maybe it doesn’t have quite the cache that swagger does, but it is timely and we are betting it will make it into some rhymes in the near future. So here is the challenge…come up with a rhyme using “stimulus package” in it somewhere - and write it as a comment here. The best one will win a killer prize from us.
To kick it off, here is one we wrote:
I can see your stomach’s all in knots about the economic crisis
your favorite foods and grocery stores are jacking up their prices
baby, I’m going to seduce you with my fully stacked fridge
so come on wrap your hands ’round my massive stimulus package
(massive? honey please.)
New obsession. This dude:
Here is the deal. We were hanging around outside of Last Call with Carson Daly the other night, like we always do, waiting to pick up college boys, and this guy asks us for a smoke. So as one of us is pulling out a cigarette, the other one punches him in the head and we throw him into our hatchback.
Cut to later that night, we can’t sleep so we are watching NBC when we realize…shit- we kidnapped the musical guest. At that point we remember he is still in the back of the car, so we go and let him out. Crisis avoided. Phew.
Since he was pretty effin cool about not calling the cops, we figure we can help him out little. Our new friend is playing at Hotel Cafe on March 3rd. If you live in LA you should go. But don’t tell him you know us. We are pretty sure that because we were wearing sweatsuits and hooker makeup that night, he won’t recognize us in the audience. If you live in NY- download his stuff by clicking here.
“Meditation is terrific and all, but I’ve never heard of it helping anyone in a gang rape-type situation. Meditate on that.”
Danny McBride is a genius. We have been on his nuts since we first saw the red band Foot Fist Way trailer ten months ago. He was the best part of Tropic of Thunder. He was the heart of Pineapple Express and Foot Fist Way is a must buy (Now available on DVD)!
Now to give us a weekly dose of Danny, he has a show starting on HBO. Watch it this Sunday at 10:30pm, DVR it. Whatever. Take our word for it. You will not regret it.
Track number three Julio. Check it…
After the news of Robbie’s departure from LA last week (click here for blog post), we’ve been in a bit of a tailspin. What the hell is he thinking?! He is going to miss out on his chance to meet us now that he has decided to flee the US. Well you know what Robbie, this just isn’t working out.
We think we’d be better as friends. It’s not you, it’s us.
We need to down a bottle of wine and wake up next Wednesday in bed with a rebound muse. And this time, we are taking recommendations.
OPEN FORUM:
Who should be our NEW Wednesday Muse (now that Robbie is no longer the focus of our obsessions)?
Dianne Wiest Wednesdays? Lil’ Wayne Wednesdays?
Ricardo Montalban Wednesdays? Smokey The Bear Wednesdays?
Wayne Brady Wednesdays? Rocco Wednesdays?
See where we are going with this? Please help us find our anchor, as you know, life seems fairly meaningless without an interesting subject to stalk.
According to several reputable news outlets (like? WWTDD & Perez Hilton) AND three of our regular readers, there is some big news about Robbie. Apparently, his sister leaked it to the press that he will be heading out of the United States soon. According to her, he is leaving LA to return to his homeland of England where he is “loved and adored by fans and gets plenty of real press, not just some small company blog recreating images of him with their intern.”
That’s right, those are quotes around that sentence. As in somebody really said that. Maybe it was his sister, maybe it wasn’t. What is it to you anyway? Why are you making such a big deal out of this? Oh my god- look- there’s a mountain lion behind you! (sound of us running away)
As promised…the first installment of our photo tribute to the career of Robbie Williams. (We have also started playing in a soccer league as a tribute but you won’t see photos of that until something exciting happens, like one of us pukes or gets in a fight).
As we chronologically recreate iconic moments from Robbie Williams’ videos in photo essay form, you will notice we will feature various people we find on the street or in the work place. So in true BEST style, we used our intern first. Presenting:
“TAKE THAT’S ‘BACK FOR GOOD’ - NOW WITH BETTER MILEAGE, HYBRID TECHNOLOGY AND AN INTERN”
Please, once again, enjoy the full video in all its glory by clicking here.
The next installment: ANGELS, as interpreted by BEST*.
Those crazy kids over at BBC brought together the top three Robbie Williams “SuperFans” for a show. Oddly enough, we were never contacted to take part. What gives? Surely this is some sort of calculation error on the part of BBC.
Sure Kerry and Tom Wordley are a brother and sister duo that have met Robbie personally, go to every concert and know all the words to every one of his songs. Do you siblings have a weekly blog post in honor of Robbie? That’s what we thought. You two can suck it!
And although Richard Sweetman’s mummy thinks he is the spitting image of Robbie, we think Dicky should take his mom in for an eye check because we don’t see it.
Here’s the thing. It’s a new year and we stand firm and committed to meeting Robbie in ‘09.
Whatever it takes. Even going up against these chumps on a stupid British show. Game on bitches.